Empathic: An Unappreciated Way of Being
共情:一种未被欣赏的存在
Carl R. Rogers, Ph.D. Center for Studies of the Person La Jolla, California
(The Counseling Psychologist, 1975, Vol. 5, No. 2-10)
卡尔·罗杰斯博士,加州拉荷亚人的研究中心
《咨询心理学家》1975年,第5期
译者:郑世彦 简里里 胡永康 楼岑渡 杨妍 吴佳烨 褚安敏 刘杨
It is my thesis in this paper that we should re-examine and re-evaluate that very special way of being with another person which has been called empathic. I believe we tend to give too little consideration to an element which is extremely important both for the understanding of personality dynamics and for effecting changes in personality and behavior. It is one of the most delicate and powerful ways we have of using ourselves. In spite of all that has been said and written on this topic, it is a way of being which is rarely seen in full bloom in a relationship. I will start with my own somewhat faltering history in relation to this topic.
人格动力以及产生人格和行为的改变都极为重要。这是我们使用自身( using ourselves)的最为微妙和有力的方式之一。尽管这一主题经常被讨论和表述,但是作为一种存在方式,很少见到它在关系中全面展开。下面将开始讲述我关于这一主题的几分艰难历程。
这篇文章的主题是,我们应该重新检验和评估这种被称为共情(empathic)的与他人共处的特殊方式。我认为,我们对这一元素关注太少,而其对我们理解Personal Vacillations
个人的徘徊
Very early in my work as a therapist I discovered that simply listening to my client, very attentively, was an important way of being helpful. So when I was in doubt as to what I should do, in some active way, I listened. It seemed surprising to me that such a passive kind of interaction could be so useful.
来访者,全神贯注地倾听,就是一种重要的有效方式。所以,当我不确定该以某种主动的方式做些什么的时候,我就只是倾听。令人惊奇的是,这样一种被动的交流方式竟如此有用。
在我作为治疗师的早期生涯中,我发现仅仅是倾听我的A little later a social worker, who had a background of Rankian training, helped me to learn that the most effective approach was to listen for the feelings, the emotions whose patterns could be discerned through the client's words. I believe she was the one who suggested that the best response was to "reflect" these feelings back to the client-- "reflect" becoming in time a word which made me cringe. But at that time it improved my work as therapist, and I was grateful.
情感、情绪,通过他们的言语可以辨别出他们的互动模式。我相信她的建议是,最好的回应便是把这些情感“反映”(reflect)给来访者——“反映”立即成了我奉承的一个词。但是,那时它帮助了我作为治疗师的工作,因此我心存感激。
后来,一位有着兰克学派(Rankian)背景的社会工作者,帮助我了解到最有效的方法是倾听来访者的Then came my transition to a full-time university position where, with the help of students, I was at last able to scrounge equipment for recording our interviews. I cannot exaggerate the excitement of our learnings as we clustered about the machine which enabled us to listen to ourselves, playing over and over some puzzling point at which the interview clearly went wrong, or those moments in which the client moved significantly forward. (I still regard this as the one best way of learning to improve oneself as a therapist.) Among many lessons from these recordings, we came to realize that listening to feelings and "reflecting" them was a vastly complex process. We discovered that we could pinpoint the therapist response which caused a fruitful flow of significant expression to become superficial and unprofitable. Likewise we were able to spot the remark which turned a client's dull and desultory talk into a focused self- exploration.